Month: April 2018

That Should Have Been My Promotion

Another update from the Jungle…

Abigail is deeply depressed about her job. She was passed over for a promotion again. Her boss, Maryanne, thinks she’s just sulking. Of course, Maryanne is a busy manager and seldom wastes a moment thinking about Abigail.

Abigail doesn’t need much managerial oversight. She’s a self-starter who steadily slogs along to reach all her goals ahead of the deadline. She’s good at spotting potential problems and seems to effortlessly incorporate solutions into her pre-existing time table. Her diffident attitude disarms her more pompous co-workers who usually resist efforts at teamwork or productivity during working hours. As a result, Abigail can achieve fantastic results.

She would be a great manager if not for a single, glaring failure. She seems to lack confidence and belief in her own abilities. She annoys co-workers by vocally agonizing over major decisions and often second-guesses herself.

So when Maryanne was looking for someone to promote, she ignored Abigail and picked puffed up Paul, a shameless self-promoter. He likes being in charge because “supervising” means he does less actual work.

Co-workers secretly despise him because he has the ethics of a cornered rat. But they laugh at his jokes because they know he’s in tight with the senior managers. Besides, he’s funny when he imitates a co-worker’s personal habits. His most frequent target is Abigail.

Paul is smart enough to see Abigail’s abilities even if she’s riddled with doubts. He usually asks for Abigail when he’s put in charge of a project. She does the work; he takes the credit. Since he doesn’t want anyone to know who’s really running the show, he adopts a condescending attitude when talking to her.

He never hesitates to notify senior managers about his brilliant leadership capabilities. So when the promotion opened up, they suggested to Maryanne that Paul would be a good choice.

What options are available to Abigail?

  1. She can continue stewing about the injustice of the stupid management team for ignoring her skills.
  2. She can spray paint “loser” on Paul’s sporty new car when no one’s watching.
  3. She can seek professional help to overcome her habit of second-guessing her abilities, then get a new job where she will not be handicapped by previous performance evaluations.

Many low-key workers are passed over for promotions because of doubts about their abilities. HR can help by encouraging management to pay for professional coaches to help these workers develop the skills needed to be a successful manager. The company will benefit from having a wider, more diverse pool of potential candidates for promotions.

If your company is struggling with HR issues, Corporate Compliance Risk Advisor can help you create HR policies that are appropriate for your company’s size and then serve as a resource to your staff as the policies are implemented.

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Now What?

Another update from the Jungle…

Michelle is sitting at her desk, diligently working on a tedious data entry project. Just because it’s a regular part of her duties doesn’t mean that she enjoys doing it. Suddenly, her manager looms into view.

Sam is a pretty good manager, as managers go. Michelle’s had lots worse than him. But he gets fixated on the stupidest things. Last week he decided to change the information that he wants to track in the database she’s working on. As a result of this change, Michelle spent most of the week revising her database to add the new information.

Michelle wasn’t mad about that. She’s worked on projects before where Sam changed his mind about the metrics halfway through the process. She had already set up her database to track the new information Sam wants. What made her mad is that two months ago, when she suggested including this information, Sam dismissed her suggestion without thinking about it.

Michelle really wants to limit her work-related stress because she has plenty of personal drama at home. Her parents are resisting her efforts to move them into an assisted living facility because they think it’s a plot to have them declared mentally incompetent. Her teenage daughter mopes that her life is blighted forever because Michelle refused to let her attend a party hosted by a classmate while the classmate’s parents were out of town.

But it’s a new week. Michelle is sitting at her desk, drinking a double espresso, waiting for the caffeine to kick in. Suddenly, Sam pops up at her elbow. He says that an email she sent yesterday contained erroneous information.

Michelle asks if Sam wants her to send another email correcting her earlier one. No, he says, that’s not necessary because it doesn’t really matter. He just wants to be sure she knows that she made a mistake. Michelle stares blankly at Sam, calculating the consequences to her career if she tries to brain him with a laptop computer.

What should Michelle do next?

  1. She can give in to her impulse to brain her manager with a laptop computer and damn the consequences.
  2. She can plan a vacation on a deserted island to get away from work and family annoyances.
  3. She can ignore her manager’s nitpicking criticisms as her co-workers do.

Workplace relationships are often our longest lasting human interactions aside from our families. As with families, annoying habits disrupt our working relationships. HR can help by ensuring that new hires and existing employees are a good “fit” for the team.

If your company is struggling with HR issues, Corporate Compliance Risk Advisor can help you create HR policies that are appropriate for your company’s size and then serve as a resource to your staff as the policies are implemented.

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I’ve Got My Eye on You

Another update from the Jungle…

Nathan is a good worker when he feels motivated to work. In the beginning, he was excited because it was all so new, and he felt challenged by his job. As he gained experience, he became bored by the repetitive tasks that make up his job.

Boredom was soon replaced by a feeling of being hunted. It hit him like a ton of bricks during a weekly meeting for his work crew. As Nathan listened to his manager, Bill, droning on about the latest productivity initiative, it reminded him of living at home with his mom and dad.

His mom nagged him to eat his broccoli so that he’d stay healthy. His company’s wellness program nags him to eat well so that he doesn’t develop chronic health conditions that are expensive to treat. His dad lectured him about the joys of working hard. Bill tells him that working hard will get him noticed and promoted, right before assigning a dirty, sweaty job to Nathan.

Now, Nathan can’t look at Bill without seeing his mom or dad ranting at him to get off the couch and clean his room or mow the lawn. His voice squeaks occasionally when talking to Bill as he slides back into his teenage years. Why can’t he be left alone to do things at his own pace?

This week Nathan’s disillusionment turned into paranoia when Bill introduced the latest productivity initiative disguised as a safety tool. Warehouse employees must wear a wristband that monitors their movements to ensure they are following safety protocols. Bill says it’s just like the monitors athletes wear when they are participating in designing new video games.

Nathan looks at his shiny new wristband, feeling like he’s got no place to hide. This must be how lab rats feel when hunting cheese in a maze. He can feel the invisible eyes on him, ready to nag him into better habits, just like being at home with his mom and dad.

What are Nathan’s options?

  1. He can pretend he’s a rebel in a science fiction movie and fight the evil empire by trying to outwit the wristband monitor.
  2. He can accept the loss of privacy as a trade-off for having any job that allows him to not live with his parents.
  3. He can look for another employer that does less surveillance of employees.

Having the technology to do something doesn’t mean that implementation is a good idea. Employers who create a good corporate culture have employees who are productive without surveillance technology.

If your company is struggling with HR issues, Corporate Compliance Risk Advisor can help you create HR policies that are appropriate for your company’s size and then serve as a resource to your staff as the policies are implemented.

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They Think He’s Great

Another update from the Jungle…..

Jason is the greatest asset to his company since it was founded decades ago. At least, that’s what he believes. He’s always the first to volunteer to help the team, and he smiles at even the lamest jokes told by the boss. He absolutely oozes sympathy for co-workers going through a rough patch.

The bosses also think that Jason is wonderful. At almost every staff meeting, the head honcho thanks Jason for helping out on something or other. No one ever asks his peers how they feel about Jason.

His peers agree that Jason is always the first to volunteer, especially if the boss is within sight and sound. Yet somehow, Jason never works up a sweat. At the last volunteer day, filling food baskets at the local food bank, Jason was seen chatting with the food bank’s executive director. Meanwhile, his colleagues were slinging cases of canned goods around the warehouse.

As for sympathy, Katie curls her lip at the very idea of Jason caring about others. Katie notices that Jason’s kind words feel empty and insincere, not even skin-deep. When Katie’s goldfish died, Jason stopped by her desk, looked at the dead fish, and said “Sorry, Charlie, you’re not the king of the sea anymore”.

Jason’s always making snarky comments like that. He said he liked Angela’s suggestion to implement a flex-work schedule because he could use an extra day off to improve his golf game. He bragged appreciatively about getting a gift card to Sonic drive-in after winning a trivia contest during the annual employee appreciation day.

Katie thinks Jason is a selfish pig who says whatever he needs to say to win brownie points with the boss. At today’s staff meeting, the boss enthusiastically announced a friendly contest to guess who will win the World Series. Katie couldn’t care less about baseball and declines to participate. Of course, Jason is front and center, bantering with the boss about which team to support.

What are Katie’s options?

  1. She can slap the smarmy smile off Jason’s face.
  2. She can ignore Jason and the boss as they engage in a mutual admiration society.
  3. She can focus her energies on improving her skills to move to a different department or a new employer.

Every work place has a Jason who plays the game to get promoted or avoid having to work too hard. HR can reduce the effects of these types of morale killers by creating performance metrics that rely on data rather than the subjective opinions of a manager.

If your company is struggling with HR issues, Corporate Compliance Risk Advisor can help you create HR policies that are appropriate for your company’s size and then serve as a resource to your staff as the policies are implemented.

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April Fool’s. Not.

Another update from the Jungle…

April Fool’s Day was three days ago, but some idiots are still pulling pranks. Danny showed up early on Monday with nylon fishing line which he used as a tether for a stuffed mouse he bought at a pet store. The morning was punctuated with screams as he yanked his mouse across the hallway each time the elevator doors opened.

Pam, from the HR Department, confiscated Danny’s mouse and threatened to let his co-workers beat him to a pulp if he tried the same trick on Tuesday. On Tuesday, Danny showed up with whoopee cushions and plastic snakes. By lunch, Pam had collected his entire stash.

This morning, Pam was waiting for Danny in the elevator lobby. While Danny distracted her, his co-conspirators sneaked in to the break room to raid the recycling bin in the kitchen. Jim and Barbara are military veterans, and they want to create a homemade bazooka they heard about while in the service.

First, they cut the ends off aluminum soda cans and duct tape them into a long tube. Then, they poke a hole in the bottom of the last can to create a breach. A crowd of curious co-workers gathers to watch. Barbara stuffs a tennis ball down the tube. Jim produces a cigarette lighter and ignites a spark. With a whoosh and a shoomp, the tennis ball hurtles across the room and smashes a hole in the plasterboard wall. Everyone scatters as Pam runs in to the break room.

Pam knows what’s really wrong with Danny, Jim, and Barbara. They’re bored and restless. The company has been fighting a hostile takeover for months, and employees are afraid of job cuts if the takeover happens.

During the slower winter months, everyone simply waited, too cold to care.  Now, spring is here, and employees are twitchy as the takeover saga continues. Management has been very slow about updating employees on what’s happening.

What options are available for Pam?

  1. She can announce a contest to keep the April Fool’s Day practical jokes going for the entire month.
  2. She can begin playing her own practical jokes on co-workers to show that HR isn’t always the “Department of No.”
  3. She can suggest that management hold a “town hall” meeting to update employees on the hostile takeover and what it means for the employees.

Having a little fun to break the monotony and pressure is important. But sometimes hijinks are a symptom of a deeper problem, such as uncertainty due to workplace changes. HR can help by encouraging management to regularly communicate with employees to reduce the uncertainty.

If your company is struggling with HR issues, Corporate Compliance Risk Advisor can help you create HR policies that are appropriate for your company’s size and then serve as a resource to your staff as the policies are implemented.

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Join the HR Compliance Jungle today. Click here!

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