Another update from the Jungle…
Cecily is a senior level executive at her company. Of course, she has paid a price while clawing her way to the top; her first husband left their marriage in exchange for a sizable chunk of Cecily’s retirement account.
Cecily decided to lose a few other things after her divorce. She shed twenty pounds and hired a personal trainer named Rory. Soon they were whipping up more than weight training. The more buff Cecily felt, the more she doted on Rory.
She reasoned that if men could have trophy wives, then she could have a trophy husband. Cecily was overjoyed that Rory accepted her marriage proposal. Of course, marriage to a much younger man comes with a price too. Cecily spends every spare minute at the gym trying to keep her girlish figure so that she remains physically attractive to Rory.
Her workout schedule leaves her irritable. She’s also insanely jealous of Rory. All these symptoms are duly noted by Danielle, who has been scheming to replace Cecily since joining the company. Danielle flirts with Rory every time he visits the office.
Yesterday, Rory stopped by the office to drop off Cecily’s cell phone and reading glasses she had left at home. As he walked away from Cecily’s office, Danielle suddenly popped up at his elbow taking deep breaths to show off her best feature.
Cecily came out of her office to confirm she would be able to have a romantic dinner with Rory that evening. She saw Danielle oozing around Rory, white teeth flashing in a seductive smile. With a jealous shriek, Cecily leaped for Danielle’s throat. The women crashed against the wall and rolled into the elevator lobby, a writhing mass of biting, kicking and hair pulling.
The women were pried apart by Rory with a little help from Walter. Walter is the owner and he’s flabbergasted to see his Chief Human Resources Officer rolling around the lobby floor with one of the rising young executives. He needs to do something fast.
What are Walter’s options?
- He can encourage Cecily to join the women’s division of the ultimate fighter competitions.
- He can fire Cecily and Danielle for setting such an atrocious example while violating dozens of HR policies.
- He can give them a second chance in recognition of the cost of replacing them but require them to undergo counseling.
In the actual situation, the HR officer did not fight the provocative co-worker but she limited her husband’s visits to the office. HR employees who violate HR policies should be treated the same as other employees when deciding on disciplinary action.
If your company is struggling with HR issues, Corporate Compliance Risk Advisor can help you create HR policies that are appropriate for your company’s size and then serve as a resource to your staff as the policies are implemented.
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Dawn, the Chief Talent Officer for her company, is slogging through the remaining weeks of the political campaign. She hates what it’s done to her job. This week she’s thinking of changing her title to Chief Tortured Officer
to show up every morning to depress Dawn with her worries that the election will degenerate into violence and mayhem.
The workforce is as divided as the nation and it’s getting ugly. Yesterday Rory broke up a fight in the employee parking lot. The Trump and Clinton supporters were trying to rip the opposing candidate’s stickers off car bumpers. Rory waded in, knocked a few heads together and ordered everyone back to work.
t the candidates and their families. Then they stand around arguing about what they’ve read.
team managed a product line worth more than all the rest of the products managed by Leo’s division. Luckily for Ted, he appealed to Oscar.
Now Leo and Ted are trying to screw each other’s careers by sucking up to Oscar. They suck up by inviting Oscar to happy hour. Oscar appreciates having Leo or Ted cover his bar tab. But all these soggy nights mean that productivity is suffering as Leo and Ted slide into alcoholism.
senior management team about Leo’s and Ted’s potential disability due to alcoholism.
Alan owns an auto repair shop and he seems to have a revolving door for employees. He knows that not everyone wants to be a grease monkey and finding employees is not easy. In fact, he’s hired people who otherwise would never have experienced the joys of employment. With so much turn over Alan never created written policies for his employees.
Alan lets them use some of his tools and equipment to build cars that they race on dirt tracks during the summer. If they don’t wreck their dirt track car, they celebrate by getting drunk on Jack Daniels (black label only; green label is for sissies). When work is slow, Sam and Zeke also like to do a little target practice at the makeshift shooting range they created on the back part of Alan’s property.
Julia, the HR manager, is watching her company’s diversity and inclusion program go hideously wrong. Julia pushed every level of management all the way to the C-suite, urging them to broaden the pool of employees eligible for promotion to management. What did all her effort get her? Margaret.
any actions they take are likely to be undermined by Margaret. Most of them are applying for transfers away from her.
Cindy is the HR director for her company because she is a good listener and she can handle obnoxious people. She got the job because the owner hates conflict (and he’s one of the obnoxious people, although no one likes to mention this). Cindy listens patiently to her distressed co-workers, dispenses Kleenex and aspirin as needed, and generally puts an optimistic spin on the worst calamities.
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