Another update from the Jungle…..
Marsha is too young to be an original hippie, but she does a great job channeling the 1960’s with peasant blouses and baggie pants or flowing skirts. She likes herbal remedies, some of which she cooks up in her kitchen. Her homemade dishes are the reason Wayne, the owner, now caters the potluck lunches for the office. 
During Marsha’s eastern religions phase, the office reeked of sandalwood. Marsha said it helped her maintain her inner calm in the midst of life’s chaos. Since she lives in a state of perpetual crisis, none of her co-workers were convinced of the healing properties of incense.
During her Native American phase, she decided to purify the office by burning sweet grass. Unfortunately, the bushel basket sized wad of smoldering foliage set off the sprinklers causing water to run out of the downstairs light fixtures. Wayne is still fighting with the landlord to save his lease and with his insurer to cover the damages to the downstairs tenant’s office.
Marsha is an excellent worker when she focuses on her job, which is why Wayne didn’t fire her after the sweet grass fiasco. Yet, he’s regretting his generosity because Marsha’s newest obsession is CBD oils. She says the oils have cured her anxiety, her forgetfulness and her insomnia.
Marsha is so wrapped up in talking about the wonderful qualities of CBD oils that she sometimes forgets important deadlines. Two weeks ago, Wayne had to pour several scotches into the owner of a key client during an expensive dinner to convince him not to fire Wayne’s company.
But Wayne’s life just got worse. Marsha now sells CBD oils. Co-workers scatter at Mach speed when they see her toting a canvas bag with her product. Last week Wayne ordered her to stop selling her oils on company time because he needs her to do the job he’s paying her to do. Today he came into the office unexpectedly after a lunch meeting was canceled and found Marsha conducting a QVC-type demo of her oils for co-workers too slow to escape.
What options are available to Wayne?
He can join Marsha as a latter day hippie and begin acting groovy.- He can assign her to a virtual office to reduce her ability to interfere with the office routine.
- He can find a replacement and then hire a feng shui practitioner to purify the office after Marsha leaves.
CBD oils lack the chemical compounds that cause an hallucinogenic effect and so are not within the scope of drug use policies. As long as usage doesn’t interfere with an employee’s ability to do her/his job, employers should take no action.
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The policy requires employees to include a statement that Wesley is a brilliant and inspiring boss and the employee is privileged to work for and learn from him. 
post and reserving the right to monitor employees’ social media for violations of the policy.
Recovering her composure, Janice explains that until the big break arrives, Millie may want to learn a few things about her current job.
Sarah sat at her desk and pondered how she’d get rid of the body after she kills her youngest team member. The dumpster behind the building is a no-go; the police always dumpster dive for clues like dead bodies. There’s no swamp nearby either where she can hide the body. Sarah sighed.
Sarah has always offered a lot of freedom to her staff because she believes that gets the creative juices flowing. But there’s a limit. So immediately after the client meeting, Sarah explained the importance of not disagreeing with the person who signs your paycheck, especially in front of clients. Taylor mumbled a sort of apology.
Patsy leans around the cubicle corner to ask Doris for a little assistance. Doris is on the phone. Rebecca, on her other side, clues Patsy in to a few basic procedures, such as which database takes which customer information. Patsy realizes from prior experiences that she’s just gone through “orientation” and gets to work.
She can reach across the desk and slap the HR rep for not ensuring she received proper training.
SAS recruits were trained as paratroopers. They did most of their training on the ground due to a lack of aircraft for training missions. How do you train a paratrooper without jumping out of an airplane? Paddy Mayne is credited with the solution: recruits jumped out of a jeep or truck moving at 30 mph while wearing full-kit (120 pounds).
Kate doesn’t want the job. She has years of supervisory experience, but she’s no longer interested in riding herd on a bunch of people who are used to doing whatever they want. She still intends to enjoy the show as others compete to replace Steve; corporate succession fights are as ferocious as mixed martial arts fights, only with fewer rules. 
Meanwhile, Kim bustles around clutching her iPad with a thoughtful frown. She’s trying to look authoritative, which isn’t easy to pull off when you’re barely five feet tall and weigh less than a fully-grown German shepherd. She proclaims to everyone that it’s time a woman was given the job. 
Every morning, Kate braces for the stream of excited co-workers who stop by to tell her their theories on who should replace Steve. Their gossip updates Kate on the shifting alliances among her co-workers.
In the actual situation, an outsider was hired to replace “Steve” leading to an exodus of disappointed internal applicants, and a new round of alliances to win favor with the new guy. Office politics will remain a standard workplace feature as long as human nature remains the same. 
Linda opened her business one year ago when she was fed up with all the petty rules and employee bickering at her last job. Her friends Julie and Rhonda joined her. They agreed that their new business would be a happy place where workers were free to be creative and enjoy coming to work. That was the last time they agreed on anything.
Two hours later, Rhonda galloped into the office. She screamed at Linda that she had been working non-stop for months and couldn’t take it anymore. She continued, saying she wished she had never left her old job just to work with such an ungrateful witch. Julie bounced out of the workshop to say that Linda’s rotten inability to set priorities was the cause of their problems.
Fran is a passionate woman who supports many worthy causes. Every day she arrives at work, gets a cup of herbal tea and begins looking for an audience to unburden herself.
Mike points out that pet shelters are full and often have no choice but to euthanize animals. She tears up at the thought of dead puppies. Will is a “manly man” who enjoys fishing and hunting. He also believes in conservation but detests Fran’s moralizing. So he retaliates with a story of deer hunting which ends with him killing Bambi’s mother.
Fran’s supervisor, Mindy, is also exhausted from frustration. She’s taking heat for low productivity caused by Fran’s lousy work habits and the interruptions to other employees’ work. She’s tried performance improvement plans without success. She’s thinking of skipping the initial steps in the progressive discipline policy and going straight to justifiable homicide in a bid to save her own career.
HR Compliance Jungle 